PED… The Struggle is Real!

Yes, PED. For anybody reading this asking what is PED?, well it’s an abbreviation for Post Eurovision Depression and it is a real phenomenon. Let me explain…

A month ago today I was about to fly out to Stockholm in Sweden for a week of Eurovision madness. As you know, I had a fantastic time, so fantastic in fact that I am still struggling to get on the level of reality. This is actually a serious blog which I wanted to share, as for the last month I have felt very low and in the dumps about the whole thing, it’s really hard to explain, but by being in a “bubble” for a short but intense time, and having the time of your life, ordinary life is such a hard adjustment to adapt back into.

They don’t call it the Eurovision “bubble” without a reason.

I met so many fantastic people on my recent trip, and because we all shared the same passion, it was really easy to get on with people and I think between us we all bounced off the positivity of each other. When it’s all over and you’re back home, or away from that environment, you find yourself isolated from the real world, or at least that’s how I feel.

I have tried to keep myself busy over the last month but it all comes back to feeling dis-interested and unenthusiastic which in turn encourages me to not be busy and to keep myself to myself. Depression is such a serious subject and I am not trying to make light of the subject in any way, and to be honest, I do feel a sense of depression. I’d have thought by now that I would be over it and be back to normal but I am finding it so hard to get out of bed and do things which I would normally enjoy, like going cycling.

The perfect weather to go cycling, yet finding enthusiasm is hard.

Why am I writing about this in a blog instead of doing something about it? Well, talking is normally the best medicine and by talking about it, or more accurately writing about it, I can put my thoughts into perspective and analyse what it is that is making me feel low and hopefully find a way to get out of it. So many people are afraid to discuss their mental health but I do think it should be said more how people are feeling, and hopefully by doing that you could reach out to somebody else who feels that way, thus creating a connection and possibly helping that person or the original person to get better.

Going back to the reasons as to why I feel low right now, I think what doesn’t help the situation is that Eurovision is a one time event, I mean you could argue that all of the National Finals and Preview Parties keeps it going for weeks on end but we could probably agree that nothing comes close to the big event, this applies to die hard fans like me by the way. I see it as a big build up over a few months to what is essentially 3 TV Shows in May. When it is all over, that’s it, and the reality is that you have to wait for about 7/8 months until the National Final season starts again. Maybe fans of other shows or sports could relate to this in some way? Like, that feeling that it’s all over and pretty much that feeling of “what am I going to do/watch now?”. It’s that x100 for die hard fans, especially with events like Eurovision where you are like in a little bubble, a safe and happy bubble, and then that bubble bursts leaving you to fend for yourself again. It’s strange because just over a month ago I was doing just that, but now it’s like a struggle trying to get that sense of normality back.

I know I will get there, there will be something else that will come along soon enough which will distract me and bring me back to a good place. Just this weekend, for example, I will be heading up to London to spend time with my friend and then also partake in the Color Run at Wembley Stadium, which I know will be epic! I will also be seeing Coldplay live at Wembley too on the 19th June and I am almost guaranteed to have a fantastic time there. Soon, this low point will be a distant memory, but not too distant I hope as I want to remember this, so that next time I can do something else to hopefully aid this PED and adjust my life accordingly to fit. This is another reason why I have chosen to write and publish a blog about this, it means that it’s there in a public space and it cannot be avoided.

Wembley Stadium is going to be my haunt this month.

I will be more positive in my next blog, I promise you. The summer is here and I love the summer so much, apart from the hayfever which I am also suffering with currently. This will soon pass though and then I can focus on having a good time and hopefully do a lot more cycling as well. For now though, I am going to list three things which I am going to do before June is through and I will report back next month (in my next blog!) about how I have got on…

  1. Go for a swim. I always feel so much better after going swimming, it’s also great exercise and will eradicate hayfever symptoms too.
  2. Get a haircut. My hair is getting long now, and neglected. It’s time to get some style back, after all I have a whole new wardrobe now. A haircut always makes things better too.
  3. Cycle a total of 50 miles this month. A hard one but a good goal to have. I need to get back on my bike and tackle more distance, whether it be local or elsewhere. The sun is out and I always feel magnificent after a ride in the sunshine! Will I make it to 50 miles though!?

Anyway, thank you for taking the time to read this blog and join me again soon for another look into my life. Please get in contact if in any way you can connect with me about any of the things I have discussed.